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Legions of Loners: Alone in the Crowd


09-17-2016, 05:30 PM #1
Karlysymon
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Marshall
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The modern life is many things. We are more connected than ever before and yet increasing numbers of people feel lonely. What is going on? Has loneliness become 'attractive'? Is it to escape having to deal with other peoples' issues and only maintain an existence that is already under so much pressure? With this, a rise in apathy has been noted.
Over the decades, family structures have changed. The nuclear family has shrunk and so has the role of the extended family. Although the information in the links centres on the American and british society, it is a growing trend worldwide.
"Loneliness is more widespread
among the young than those
past retirement age, a survey
suggests, amid profound
changes in the way we live and
interact. In the report by the Lonely
Society, nearly 60% of those
questioned, aged between 18 to
34 spoke of feeling lonely often
or sometimes, compared to
35% of those aged over 55. "]

"Modern life is making us
lonelier, and recent research
indicates that this may be the
next biggest public health issue
on par with obesity and
substance abuse. A recent review of studies indicates that loneliness increases mortality
risk by 26%. "
http://independent.co.uk/life-style/heal...43206.html

*At 26 percent, America has the
highest percentage of one person households on the entire planet.
*100 years ago, 4.52 were living
in the average U.S. household,
but now the average U.S.
household only consists of 2.59 people.
http://www.endoftheamericandream.org/arc...-structure
[The National Science Foundation
(NSF) reported in its General
Social Survey (GSS) that unprecedented numbers of
Americans are lonely. Published
in the American Sociological
Review (ASR) and authored by
Miller McPhearson, Lynn Smith-
Lovin, and Matthew Brashears, sociologists at Duke and the
University of Arizona, the study
featured 1,500 face-to-face
interviews where more than a
quarter of the respondents —
one in four — said that they have no one with whom they
can talk about their personal
troubles or triumphs. If family
members are not counted, the
number doubles to more than
half of Americans who have no one outside their immediate
family with whom they can
share confidences. Sadly, the
researchers noted increases in
“social isolation” and “a very
significant decrease in social connection to close friends and
family.”
http://spectator.org/59230_loneliness-american-society/
http://stellamorabito.net/2014/05/27/ame...than-ever/

09-17-2016, 05:53 PM #2
Ambuler
***
Marshall
Status: Offline Posts:347 Likes Received:823
(09-17-2016, 05:30 PM)Karlysymon Wrote:  The modern life is many things. We are more connected than ever before and yet increasing numbers of people feel lonely. What is going on? Has loneliness become 'attractive'? Is it to escape having to deal with other peoples' issues and only maintain an existence that is already under so much pressure? With this, a rise in apathy has been noted.  
Over the decades, family structures have changed. The nuclear family has shrunk and so has the role of the extended family. Although the information in the links centres on the American and british society, it is a growing trend worldwide.  
"Loneliness is more widespread
among the young than those
past retirement age, a survey
suggests, amid profound
changes in the way we live and
interact. In the report by the Lonely
Society, nearly 60% of those
questioned, aged between 18 to
34 spoke of feeling lonely often
or sometimes, compared to
35% of those aged over 55. "]

"Modern life is making us
lonelier, and recent research
indicates that this may be the
next biggest public health issue
on par with obesity and
substance abuse. A recent review of studies indicates that loneliness increases mortality
risk by 26%. "
http://independent.co.uk/life-style/heal...43206.html

*At 26 percent, America has the
highest percentage of one person households on the entire planet.
*100 years ago, 4.52 were living
in the average U.S. household,
but now the average U.S.
household only consists of 2.59 people.
http://www.endoftheamericandream.org/arc...-structure
[The National Science Foundation
(NSF) reported in its General
Social Survey (GSS) that unprecedented numbers of
Americans are lonely. Published
in the American Sociological
Review (ASR) and authored by
Miller McPhearson, Lynn Smith-
Lovin, and Matthew Brashears, sociologists at Duke and the
University of Arizona, the study
featured 1,500 face-to-face
interviews where more than a
quarter of the respondents —
one in four — said that they have no one with whom they
can talk about their personal
troubles or triumphs. If family
members are not counted, the
number doubles to more than
half of Americans who have no one outside their immediate
family with whom they can
share confidences. Sadly, the
researchers noted increases in
“social isolation” and “a very
significant decrease in social connection to close friends and
family.”
http://spectator.org/59230_loneliness-american-society/
http://stellamorabito.net/2014/05/27/ame...than-ever/
Wow.  Guess I'm not that weird after all.

09-18-2016, 02:01 AM #3
Thy Unveiling
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Chaplain
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There's definitely an agenda behind the rise in isolation. I think the general lack of socialization (past social media) is because people are too busy, or burnt out, or distrustful of others, or all of the above, to maintain relationships. Even people who live together barely see each other, depending on their schedules. (Which can be a huge factor in the deterioration of many marriages, or why affairs happen since Husband or Wife become closer with co-workers, who they see more often than their spouse; whom they only ever seem to argue with...)

But yannow; life is a lot more peaceful when you're not dealing with other people's unnecessary drama. Family can be stressful enough Tongue
This post was last modified: 09-18-2016, 02:03 AM by Thy Unveiling.

"Be the change you want to see in the world"

There's only one true judge and that's God; so chill and let Our Father do His job
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09-18-2016, 02:42 AM #4
DesertRose1
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TBH I relax and hide out from my concerns and responsibilities by going online ......drained out there relax here....
This post was last modified: 09-18-2016, 02:49 AM by DesertRose1.

"Its better to walk alone, than with a crowd going in the wrong direction."
“O people, spread peace (extend greetings), feed the hungry, and pray at night when people are sleeping and you will enter Paradise in peace.”
[Sunan Ibn Majah 1334 (Sahih)]
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09-18-2016, 03:39 AM #5
Karlysymon
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Marshall
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(09-18-2016, 02:01 AM)Thy Unveiling Wrote:  There's definitely an agenda behind the rise in isolation. I think the general lack of socialization (past social media) is because people are too busy, or burnt out, or distrustful of others, or all of the above, to maintain relationships. Even people who live together barely see each other, depending on their schedules. (Which can be a huge factor in the deterioration of many marriages, or why affairs happen since Husband or Wife become closer with co-workers, who they see more often than their spouse; whom they only ever seem to argue with...)

But yannow; life is a lot more peaceful when you're not dealing with other people's unnecessary drama. Family can be stressful enough Tongue

So true. And its many factors. [taken from linked American Spectator article]
" It is no
accident that the social
interaction trend declined
sharply in the mid-1960s when
“doing your own thing” became
vogue and “sexual freedom” separated the physical act of sex
from the embrace of an
emotional attachment and/or a
romantic relationship. Rabbi
Daniel Lapin suggests that “we
are raising a generation of children who are orphans in
time.” He laments that today’s
generation of young people is
“incapable of integrating their
past and their future … [living]
instinctively in an almost animal-like fashion only in the
present.” He notes that it is
virtually impossible, then, to
connect time and space in a way
that enables them to build their
“present.” Thus, they wander aimlessly about without
connections — physically,
emotionally, or spiritually. Rather than acknowledge family
breakdown, some
commentators blame the
increase in social isolation on
television. In his book Bowling
Alone, Robert Putnam cited a dramatic increase in television
watching — five percent of
American households had
televisions in 1950 compared
with 95 percent in 1970. Now,
many homes have a TV in every room. Putnam provides further
reasons for the fragmentation
of the family circle and
disintegration of family life
since the 1960s: Families have
60 percent fewer family picnics and 40 percent fewer family
dinners."
[In a desperate attempt for
human love and interaction, an
increasing number of Americans
have turned to social
networking websites such as
Facebook to fill that void. For the desperately lonely, some
human contact is better than
none. In fact, a growing number
of people are so desperate for
people to talk with them that
they will pretend to be someone else online. Many will
even use an attractive picture of
someone else in an attempt to
try to lure others. This has
become so common that this
phenomenon has even been given a name. It is known as
“catfishing“, and it has grown to epidemic levels.]

Trust among people has gone down.
http://ap-gfkpoll.com/featured/our-lates...indings-24
this could not have resulted from 'see something, say something'. Maybe this partly arose from many children disappearing (think gov't experiments) and parents became more protective of their kids and less trusting of anyone else thus the kids passing the distrust onto their own kids. The BBC did a childhood series a couple years back and my interest was piqued when it was noted that 'wandering space' has significantly declined. More than 80yrs ago, kids could wander a mile or so from home and return but that is no longer the case. People are confined to their houses. Check this out:
*One Third Of UK Children
Spend Less Time Outdoors
Than US Prison Inmates*
http://zerohedge.com/news/2016-03-28/one...on-inmates
hence......no friends and no trust and the cycle goes on!
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09-18-2016, 12:09 PM #6
prib23
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Squire
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Yes people like us who post here are alone. We represent a small sliver of the sheep populace. I am married yet I feel so alone because my wife I do love is the ultimate goal citizen with no original thoughts of her own. Only Facebook feeds.
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09-18-2016, 01:09 PM #7
Lisa
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Maybe this has something to do with it?

2 Timothy 3:1-5 
But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come. For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good, treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, holding to a form of godliness, although they have denied its power; Avoid such men as these.

Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, because many false prophets have gone out into the world.  1John 4:1

Be of sober spirit, be on the alert. Your adversary the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. 1 Peter 5:8
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09-18-2016, 06:42 PM #8
prib23
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(09-18-2016, 01:09 PM)Lisa Wrote:  Maybe this has something to do with it?

2 Timothy 3:1-5 
But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come. For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good, treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, holding to a form of godliness, although they have denied its power; Avoid such men as these.
Yes that passage best describes our world today. One of my go to verses when I lay awake at night wondering what's gone wrong. I meant global citizen not goal citizen in my post. My tablet corrects wrongly at times. Many people are much cultural global hipsters. Not recognizing that it's not benign and anyone who opposes them will face social, economic and even criminal persecution. It s funny someone started this thread. I had been feeling incredibly alone lately. My friend's and family and co workers do not share our views. Forums and blogs such as this are blessings to me. I can connect with there's like minded peeps left.
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09-18-2016, 08:06 PM #9
kandi
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Squire
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(09-17-2016, 05:30 PM)Karlysymon Wrote:  The modern life is many things. We are more connected than ever before and yet increasing numbers of people feel lonely. What is going on? Has loneliness become 'attractive'? Is it to escape having to deal with other peoples' issues and only maintain an existence that is already under so much pressure? With this, a rise in apathy has been noted.  
Over the decades, family structures have changed. The nuclear family has shrunk and so has the role of the extended family. Although the information in the links centres on the American and british society, it is a growing trend worldwide.  
"Loneliness is more widespread
among the young than those
past retirement age, a survey
suggests, amid profound
changes in the way we live and
interact. In the report by the Lonely
Society, nearly 60% of those
questioned, aged between 18 to
34 spoke of feeling lonely often
or sometimes, compared to
35% of those aged over 55. "]

"Modern life is making us
lonelier, and recent research
indicates that this may be the
next biggest public health issue
on par with obesity and
substance abuse. A recent review of studies indicates that loneliness increases mortality
risk by 26%. "
http://independent.co.uk/life-style/heal...43206.html

*At 26 percent, America has the
highest percentage of one person households on the entire planet.
*100 years ago, 4.52 were living
in the average U.S. household,
but now the average U.S.
household only consists of 2.59 people.
http://www.endoftheamericandream.org/arc...-structure
[The National Science Foundation
(NSF) reported in its General
Social Survey (GSS) that unprecedented numbers of
Americans are lonely. Published
in the American Sociological
Review (ASR) and authored by
Miller McPhearson, Lynn Smith-
Lovin, and Matthew Brashears, sociologists at Duke and the
University of Arizona, the study
featured 1,500 face-to-face
interviews where more than a
quarter of the respondents —
one in four — said that they have no one with whom they
can talk about their personal
troubles or triumphs. If family
members are not counted, the
number doubles to more than
half of Americans who have no one outside their immediate
family with whom they can
share confidences. Sadly, the
researchers noted increases in
“social isolation” and “a very
significant decrease in social connection to close friends and
family.”
http://spectator.org/59230_loneliness-american-society/
http://stellamorabito.net/2014/05/27/ame...than-ever/

Hi, I hope you have a good day!
I'm latina and we have traditional family values over here of course not all latinos are like this but we tend to appreciate more our family values, i come from a tight-knit family and we tend to have a lot of family reunions and long family dinners and i believe that is the same type of culture with the spanish and the italians.
And all these family values and long family reunions, is what keep our countries in all Latin America together. Yes, we have poverty and insecurity like any other country in the world but i really believe Latinos tend to feel happier because they have traditional family values and that's what makes people feel good. To have someone to share your life is very important because What is the point of having a good life if you can't share it with anyone? so always remember to tell your family, friends, children or partner how much you love them, is very important to keep your family together. Big Grin
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09-18-2016, 10:46 PM #10
Thy Unveiling
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I don't think it's so much that westerners don't value family, or that we have a love of money over family, but rather that the majority of us have to go to work in order to provide for our families (and selves.) It isn't ideal, nobody likes it, but because we exist in a world where we are charged too much for basic needs, we have to spend more time at work than with the people we love. If I didn't have to worry about the expenses of life in this century, I would love to stay home with the little one and keep the house looking nice. I really would. But I am a slave to the corrupt system, just as too many other people are over here. It is not because we don't value our families, though.

It is very sad how we don't let the kids play outside the way we did growing up. Although, the majority of my friends were molested by trusted adults. I think I may have been as well. So yeah, we wanna protect our kids and keep them close. There was a p***phile found out with a house near the daycare in the town I grew up in. Another one with his house and kiddy porn by a school where I currently live. Can't trust anyone. Trust too much; kids get damaged. Don't trust anyone; kids still get damaged but at least the scars didn't start as anal fissures. And yes, kids disappear all the time. This is why they're over protected and lack knowing what to do with themselves. We're all just winging it. Especially Gen X-ers. We were among the last to ride our bikes with friends all day. We existed in a time before the internet. We remember when beepers were all the rage, and when cellphones and DVD players were new. We remember when Netflix was some weird DVD ordering rental thing that few understood; the rest of us went to Blockbuster to rent movies. With our friends. Whom we'd been out with since early morning.  But times changed very rapidly and now the way we grew up is considered "free range parenting" and is frowned upon. It's really quite bizarre how fast this all happened. The kids aren't the only ones wondering wtf to do.

"Be the change you want to see in the world"

There's only one true judge and that's God; so chill and let Our Father do His job
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